Valkyrie Watch

From Fox News:

Tom Cruise’s “Valkyrie” has been pulled apart like warm bread. As I said last week, it’s toast.

Actually, “Valkyrie,” one of the worst ideas for a film ever, has been postponed again for release. Now instead of an October release date, the Nazi assassination plot film gets knocked to Presidents’ Weekend, 2009.

It’s not only Presidents’ Weekend, but it’s also Valentine’s Day on that Saturday. That means MGM/UA is expecting audiences to go to a violent nearly all-male (and over-30-male, to boot) film about heroic Nazis who get themselves murdered by Hitler. The female audience will not want to see it.

I know I for one am looking forward to this movie, I am practically a crap movie connoisseur.  Something about Tom Cruise playing nazi with an eyepatch makes me grin.  Besides, Stephen Fry is in it, so it has to be decent… right?

Anyway, be sure to check out the trailer, just to see what I mean.  Tom Cruise sticks out like William H. Macy in In Enemy Hands.  The difference is that William H. Macy still managed to pull it off, somehow.  Tom Cruise is too well known, and seems to lack the ability to play anyone but Tom Cruise.  Thus is the spectical of Tom Cruise as a nazi with an eyepatch.  

By the way, why is Tom Cruise the only Nazi in an American accent? That just exasperates the problem. Why are there british Nazi’s? They obviously cared enough to have at least one Nazi in a german accent, but they didn’t care enough to give them all German accents? I understand in Hollywood British accent=Foreign or Ancient, but come on. They got part of it right!

Addendum: What’s the deal with trailers that give the entire plot away?  I know that it’s an historical piece so obviously Tom Cruise is captured and killed to the audience’s enjoyment, but did they really have to give so much away?  They might as well have shown Tom Cruise being killed.

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